Last week I appeared on BBC Breakfast talking about new research into beards, their history and how attractive or otherwise the bearded, clean shaven and stubble look are perceived to me. The study was written by Rob Brooks (find more here).
As a life coach I’m always curious about our perceptions of ourselves, others and the world around us. I’m also especially interested in how culture, society and various pressures, customs and norms impact on us.
It’s one area where men’s vanity (or lack of) becomes more heightened, as perhaps, when it comes to appearance there are arguably far more pressures on women on how they should look (hair and make-up in many societies just to start with are factors).
One of the things that strikes me about stubble, beards etc is that it is a quick way in which one can try and induce a change. I certainly know that in my past that sometimes when I’ve felt like a fresh outlook I might shave stubble or a goatee beard off – and when I’ve perhaps wanted to cultivate a differing perspective then I have started to let them grow. This is just one dimension though.
When I was asked to speak on the topic of the report at first I was a little surprised and unsure and then as I thought about it (as with when I’ve been asked to speak on tattoos) that I realised, it’s like everything else, that links to our sense of self and identity.It’s only been a few hundred years in which men will have shaved so it’s interesting to think that we tend to see being clean shaven as the norm. it’s interesting that the beard may be perceived as making someone look wise, distinguished, cool, mature, mysterious, frightening, quaint, quirky, odd, fun etc depending on the style, shape, colouring, length, grooming and a whole host of other societal factors.
It’s very interesting that as we grow and ‘develop’ our appearance becomes (consciously and unconsciously) more and more of our identity. And interestingly when we seek a new perspective or other deeper changes, we often turn to changing our appearance (hair, clothes, style etc)to kick start that change. Sometimes it ends there and sometimes it’s the start.
Anything that invites us to look from these externals, more deeply into the questions of who we are, what’s important to life, how we connect and appreciate each other is an opportunity for evolution. Especially when we recognise that often it’s our desire to express our differences that points to something in our sameness. Perhaps sometimes the want to change something about our selves might actually be an opportunity to accept ourselves or to discover if our perception of ourself is just that.
Anyway I hope you enjoy the clip above.
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